So, yes. We're adjusting around here.
Emmy has morphed into this little girl, who is unwaveringly adorable in almost every way. There are the moments, of course, when she stands on the kitchen table and takes all the lids off the markers, but mostly, I can't get enough of her. There are only two ways in which I really see a difference between a girl toddler and a boy toddler (assuming Emmy is like all girls, and my boys are like all boys, which of course is a pretty broad assumption): 1. She is the first one of my children to fall, realize she is fine, stand up, look for me, then cry about falling down, and 2. When she cries, she "talks" the whole time. "Mamaaaa" so pitifully, followed by very poignant babbling that is most certainly describing her woes. Talking through it, as it were. It's really cute.
And I am adjusting to being pregnant. Last time, I feel like I put my energy into the wrong things. I tried to keep up my pre-pregnancy pace, and felt increasingly frustrated with myself for "failing," and with my kids for, well, needing me when I was so indescribably tired (from trying to keep up my pre-pregnancy pace). This time around, I am trying to lean into the temporary weakness of pregnancy, and just relax a bit. I am focusing on prioritizing, and nurturing my relationships with my family first. Everything beyond that is negotiable. I am also trying to pace myself, and recognize fatigue before it becomes overwhelming. If I need to sit down, I do.
All of that means that I'm spending more time in my favorite chair - talking or reading with the kids, or just sitting sometimes while they play around me. Just because they are occupied does not mean I have to go do something else. We may go to the pool and the library one day, but not leave the house the next. I am avoiding errands at all costs (how much energy do we usually spend in the car and the grocery store?! Brian has completely picked up the slack in this area). And my favorite time of day has become early afternoons - not because I can get things done while everyone naps, but because I stretch out with the boys and watch a half hour of a Disney movie while Silas drifts off to sleep.
It all sounds peaceful on paper. Sometimes it is. And sometimes, Emmy stands on the kitchen table and takes all the lids off the markers. Sometimes the boys love to sit beside me while I rest, and sometimes Silas says, "Mo-om! Pause your computer and get my drink!" And it goes without saying that it looks as though the Lost Boys have invaded my house. But I feel better, mentally and physically, than I did the last go round. So far, anyway. And despite the potential for chaos, the tone around here is mostly relaxed.
If I have to choose between a peaceful house and a clean one, I'll go with peace.