We have hit the hump. What I remember most clearly from Asher's first few months of life is the fourth week. You can do anything for a little while, but sleep deprivation is cumulative. By week 4, Asher was his fussiest, and I was my most desperate. This was the week that I drove to Auburn just to make a phone call (he would sleep in the car, and I needed him to sleep. NEEDED it.), and began to realize there is a lot about being a mother nobody ever tells you. Like, when it gets better than week 4.
Here we are friends. Silas is 4 weeks old. He was up every two hours night before last, and every 2 1/2 last night, creating such a state of confusion in my bumfuzzled brain that at 4 a.m. I brought him to Brian. "He's crying and I don't know why," I said. "But I have to keep sleeping." Brian told me this morning he was crying because he was wet and hungry. Huh. How about that.
Add to the mix Asher, who, lined up against other toddler boys is relatively calm and easy to manage, but nonetheless has the "let's see what happens if ..." mindset that all toddlers possess. We had dinner with a friend last night, who observed, "You're going to have to throw every bit of stimulation you can at that child just to keep up. He's a little sponge." Indeed.
And here is the rub: Asher really is soaking up every thing right now. He wants to know how the world works, all of it, in no particular order. And in order to keep him from climbing the walls (to see what happens if he does) I really do need to give him as much opportunity to learn new things as possible. Which stands in direct conflict to what Silas needs, which is predictability and calm and most importantly, for the love of all that is holy, to be held. So every morning I wake up and think, who am I going to mess with today? Will I bungee Asher to the house so that Silas can have a little peace in the world, or will I strap Silas to me, let Asher live a little, and deal with the overstimulation screaming later?
Week 6 is only 10 days away, though. By week 6, my world was much brighter last time. Let's hope that will prove true now, too.
Happy Thursday every one.