part 1: the view from here

The most frustrating thing about laundry is that it never ends. Even when every single sock and towel and t-shirt has been folded and put away, you're still wearing clothes that will soon be in the hamper. The best you can hope for is an "almost done" before you start the process all over again.

Welcome to parenthood.

Asher and I can have the happiest, most peaceful, sleep-filled, full day, and the best possible scenario is that we'll wake up and do it all over again tomorrow. So, like every daily task, there's a temptation to check out, let your mind wander a bit. Except - this is also the most important job I'm ever going to do. I'm shaping somebody's personality and confidence and ability to love and be loved and succeed in life, not just in the sweeping, dramatic gestures I imagine such a job would require, but in tiny ways, all the time. It's all really intimidating.

I've decided that anyone who writes "how to" books on parenting is unbelievably presumptuous. And my drive to do everything right, to make an A in parenting, if you will, is as nutty as the books that tell me how. So, dear reader, I need you. You can help by reminding me to RELAX. ENJOY THIS (which I am, very very much, but a little reminder never hurt anyone). This isn't entirely like laundry. It does end, eventually. I don't want to remember this as an anxious time (particularly when that anxiety is self-enduced). I want to remember the silliness and dreaminess of it all, the dailyness of holding and rocking and talking to a baby. It's time for me to learn how to let "almost" be enough.

Because it really is.