Sunday, February 11, 2007

Sunday morning again. A sunny Sunday morning at that - it's not inspiring me to do all that is necessary to get out the door in an hour and a half. I'm feeling more inspired to just sit here and drink my coffee and listen to music. We have new music right now, and nothing encourages solitude like winter sunshine and new music and good coffee.

Which brings me to this -

I have always enjoyed being around people, always liked meeting and making friends. It was the joke as I was growing up - I never met a stranger, and I never stayed home very long. Until now. The older I get, the less interested I am in being busy. Not only that, but a half hour before it's time to go somewhere, I start thinking of all of the reasons I shouldn't go. There are a few exceptions, of course, but in general, if there's going to be a crowd, I can think of something better to do. Why? Why is such a prominent part of my personality changing? I really don't want to become a recluse. Why does it take so much more energy to be around a group than it used to? Any thoughts?

Think about it, and get back to me. Meanwhile, here I sit, a lizard on a rock, enjoying the winter sun and warm coffee.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I ask the exact same questions and couldn't have asked them any better than you did: "Why? Why is such a prominent part of my personality changing? I really don't want to become a recluse. Why does it take so much more energy to be around a group than it used to? Any thoughts?"

No useful thoughts here, but I would love some answers. It does feel like such a prominent part of myself has changed, and I keep waiting for it to "change back"...but that hasn't happened. In the meantime, I am embracing that I find joy in a cup of coffee, a great book, and a bit of quiet.

Let me know if you find any answers!

-(from your friend that left a voicemail...i still haven't gotten comfortable posting on cyberspace with my name for all to see...not that brave yet :)

Anonymous said...

Not sure. I have done similar. It is hit or miss on any given day if I will want to be around people or not. When the kids are in MDO, my preference is to be curled up with a good book in absolutel silence.

Tonya said...

I can't really give you any good advice, mostly because I have ALWAYS been like that. As my husband puts it, "You play a good extravert." Deep down, though, I'm an introvert. Maybe the older we get, the more memories we have, therefore the more thoughts we have, therefore the more need for introspection?