a broken heart's education

I learned just how little I need, and even how little I actually want ... when everything was stripped away, do you want to know what I missed? My coffee pot and poetry books. That's it. I was mostly wrong in what I thought I needed.

I learned how to follow rules. Even ones that seem ridiculous to me ... I learned how to respect someone else's wishes above my own. Which is really a lesson in humility.

I learned that vomit and diapers and snotty noses and other people's bathrooms are really NOT that big of a deal. You do what you have to do, and that's that.

I learned how to eat what is served to me and thank God for the ease with which I have it and shut up about the rest.

I learned that nobody is perfect, but there are people in my life who can teach me so much about love and sacrifice and obedience and the kingdom of God, if I'm willing to accept them for who they are and hear what they have to say.

I learned that the message of the cross - of denying yourself and following Jesus - is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to those who are being saved it is the very power of God.

I learned that I no longer desire adventure for adventure's sake. If someone is in ICU, I want to be able to get there. If someone's having a baby, or retiring, or having a crisis, I want to be within driving distance. There's adventure, and then there's relationships, and maybe I'm not as willing to exchange one for the other as I once was. Aubrey said it best recently when she said, "If I want to see something exciting, I'll go on vacation. Right now, I want to go home."

I learned (and am learning) about the gentleness of God. About how the One who flung stars and created light and commands demons and angels does not peel back my skin with His presence, nor does He show contempt for my piddly mild suffering. He restores us so carefully ... the reality of that amazes me.

I learned - again - how much I love my husband. I agree with you, Heather, when you said, "I wouldn’t have ever believed how much better married love is - how much better security and comfort and KNOWING your spouse is than falling head over heels in love with a stranger."