he may have a future as david hasselhoff. (updated)

(Jamie, this picture is for you. We miss you guys!)

Oh, it is INFURIATING how much the mood of our entire household reflects MY mood. Can't I just be irritable sometime without all hell breaking loose?

Not so much, no.

Yesterday, really Tuesday and Wednesday both, were not our finest. We had fun with friends both mornings, but in general, Asher was intent on doing the opposite of what is expected from him - pushing, kicking, biting, leaving time-out, etc. At one point he even put a diaper on HIMSELF rather than go to the potty when asked. And I was just as obstinate - not giving in to things that really didn't matter, not letting him win, ever.

Boo.

So yesterday after nap I told Asher that while he had been unkind to his friends, I had been unkind to him. I asked him if I could try again (which is our catch phrase with him to make sure he understands it's over and he's starting fresh). The rest of the evening was less unbearable, but I was still completely exhausted from our power struggles. I put him to bed at 7:35, and by 7:39 (no lie) I was on the couch for the night.

I was determined today would be better.

And - as exasperating as it is to admit it - it was. We started the day with books and coffee in the sunroom, avoiding the noise of news and cartoons first thing. We spent our morning at the new splash pad in town, followed by the children's portion of a local museum. We didn't go with friends - which is fun, but tends to mean I'm a little less engaged with the kids - but just spent time together, and there was not one power struggle all day long. Life was much simpler - and less exhausting - because I had a better attitude about it.

It's both scary and encouraging to know that I shape the mood in our home. I would like to roll my eyes and say, he's just acting two. Most of the time, though, I'm the one who needs to grow up.

Good night all. More on mercy and sacrifice tomorrow. Have you guys been thinking about it?