I love Monday nights because it's Bible study night, and the one time all week I see my friends without children present (which completely changes the dynamic of a conversation, mostly because you can actually finish a sentence and sit in one place). But Monday nights are not my friend because I stay up WAY too late and invariably it is the night one of my children wakes up at 4:30 a.m.
So here I sit on four hours of sleep and determined to blame somebody for it. Boo.
Also? Asher does not have an ear infection, just seasonal allergies and an acute case of being two. This morning before his appointment I decided to test my soy lecithin theory and try some regular cooked at home (not from a packet) oatmeal with Silas. He ate it, but a few minutes later I noticed his little face was red and swollen everywhere the oatmeal had touched it. So maybe it wasn't the soy lecithin that gave him trouble, but oats? And maybe, this whole time I've been praising the name of Cheerios, feeding him Cheerios ALL DAY LONG so that he'll sleep at night, and scratching my head as to how to deal with his constant runny nose and cough that have caused two sets of ear infections in three weeks, I've been inadvertently POISONING him (not really but I SWEAR that's how it feels, regardless of how irrational it may sound) with oat-filled Cheerios the entire time.
Again, boo.
I'm stressed, guys. I don't know what to feed my baby. I don't know how to give him the nutrition that he needs. And there's something very basic - instinctive - about a mother feeding her child, that not doing it well (i.e., constantly being wrong about what he's allergic to) feels like failure. It's irrational, I know. Taking responsibility for his body's attempt to ward off oats is every bit as self-absorbed and silly as taking credit for a baby who naps well or sleeps through the night. I know that he would have these allergies regardless of who his mother is. I just want to be able to do what is best for him, and right now I don't know what that is. It's incredibly frustrating.
So, we scratch it and start over. No more Cheerios. I'll give him a day or two without them and then try rice, and see how he does. Right now potatoes are his only starch. I've been waiting for his rashes and nose to clear up before I tried new foods, so that I could be clear about what he was reacting to. But it looks like I'm not going to get that luxury.
Even so, lately every time I look at him, Silas melts my heart. He's all big smiles and bright eyes right now, and I just can't help but smile when I see him. We'll keep at it, trying to find nourishment instead of triggers. His health is worth the effort.
But seriously? Tonight I'm going to bed early.
4 comments:
My son is allergic to some kind of chemical in ranch dressing. It's really weird. When he was young, he's love to eat cucumbers and ranch at my parents house and we'd notice he got this red rash around his mouth. So, we stopped letting him eat the dressing and tried the dry ranch mix with sour cream. Oddly enough, he was able to eat it, no problems. We haven't determined what exactly was in it he was allergic to either. That could be the case with Silas. Just thought I'd throw that out there.
have you talked to a nutritionist? Or an allergist? someone who can help give you a plan for figuring out what it is and then a plan for what to eat? seems like there should be someone out there who has some knowledge to share...????
A word from the mama who went through the same thing with you (only we had a few nearly life-threatening scares, averted only by liquid Benadryl): Make sure Silas gets liquid vitamins every day. After he's a year old, he won't be so sensitive to everything. I also speculate that the pollens are causing him such fits with his allergies that he's more prone to reaction. He will get better. The allergist is a good idea... You basically had nothing to eat but oatmeal the first year... After you turned about 14 or 15 months, you were able to eat a variety of foods. Just introduce them slowly -- but wait until he's completely well. Right now, you just can't tell. For additional sympathy, contact Wayne Lee or Aunt Gail, my first cousin Elaine, or any number of relatives who have shared, unfortunately, the same genes. Love you --Mama
your situation is so frustrating. trying to figure out allergies is like reading tea leaves. have you done some blood tests to help eliminate things?
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